Let sleeping dogs lie

At about 1:00 in the morning, i had an experience that both scared the shit out of me, and sent me shaking.

Woke up hearing charlie jump off the bed, and knowing dillon would soon follow and get restless, i got up to put them in the crate.

But dillon didn't move.

I nudged him, because it seemed like his body wasn't rising and falling with his breathing. He didn't move. I lifted his paw, it dropped like dead-weight. I touched his chest...i didn't feel a heartbeat. I was starting to panic, and i shook him gently, calling his name. no response.

Charlie was just watching, eerily calm.

I tickled the inside of his ear. Dillon hates that, and he didn't even twitch.

I jumped up to get mom, and upon opening the door, Dillon shot to his feet. I mean, come on. We know dillon. Shooting to his feet in one go isn't his forte. But he was up from flat on his side in a second.

"Son of a bitch" i told him, and crawled back to bed, shaking somewhat. Dillon's tail went thump-thump. Charlie jumped back on the bed...and all was well with the world again

(no subject)

Sometimes i wish i were a religious person.

Yeah, that sounded weird.

But i was thinking about it last night...how sometimes i wish i'd grown up more religiously.

I think some people just need something to believe in...whether its real or not.

Like...maybe i wouldn't lie in bed, scared shitless about something thats gonna happen like...80 years from now. that i will die and reunite with loved ones, as opposed to being plunked 6 feet under.

Mortality.

Or i could pray for someone's health and honestly believe it would reach someone's ears, and even if it wasn't granted...just be heard.

I think i'm too much of a realist sometimes. I suppose..perhaps i needed something to believe in.